Isaiah 40:31 AMP says “But those who wait for the Lord [who expect, look for, and hope in Him] Will gain new strength and renew their power; They will lift up their wings [and rise up close to God] like eagles [rising toward the sun]; They will run and not become weary, They will walk and not grow tired.”
The pain and aches grated on my heart…it hit me hard, and I could not let myself sleep. Almost like a mystery to be solved and puzzle… I was stuck… mentally and emotionally, stuck. I found myself raising my voice a lot lately…
I try to keep my cool especially living and loving on six others. One day when my six year old said… “Mom, when you say _____ it sounds like you’re mad” or “Mom, you scare me when you _______”
My heart was in deep sorrow over the words of my child and the hearts of my children. I began to cry out to God because something in me needed to change. The moment of “I can’t. I need.” And, “somethings gotta give…”
My tone hurt me, too… and I know it grieved the Father. It was something going on in my heart…
So… I did some researching and followed some parenting experts but greatest of all, I spent time with the Ultimate Father and began asking him to search my heart.
Here’s the deal: How and what I say is seen… How and what I say to my children to them, to their father, and to family and friends is seen. I began to see my children a burden rather than a blessing. I knew something had to change.
Steps I took… journaling, prayer, and I think greatest of all is God in his kindness led me to repentance. It’s been about a month and his spirit has taught me areas of strife and times of impatience and so on that has convicted me to watch 1) what I think about the situation with me and my kids 2) what I say about the situation with me and my children and 3) what I do and how I do it…
I feel weary most days, but I believe that God’s spirit in me has renewed me…
Friends, parenting isn’t easy. Most days we’re walking through the valley and plains. It’s tiring and we’re achy in body and spirit but God’s grace is sufficient and we can choose to ride on wings like eagles why? Because Greater is he who is in me… than he who is in the world. Amen?!
Action step: do you have some things you need to say sorry for? Pray and confess your sins (remember 1 John 1:9).
Prayer: God, you never leave me where I am. God, you are the perfect parent and you don’t sleep nor slumber. You are and you always will be. God, I have somethings I have to say sorry for; please forgive me for ___________________. I need your help with ___________________.
Abundant Mommyhood 